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I Don't Know
I don’t know what to tell you
I don’t know what to say
I can’t even tell you
That everything’s okay.
I know we don’t have money,
We’re always pressed for time.
I know that you still love me
I know that you are mine.
I know you like to smile
and laugh a whole lot too.
I know things take a while
and that I’ll wait for you
I wish you could be patient
I wish you would be kind
I wish that you would take my hint
I wish you weren’t so blind.
I wish that you wouldn’t do it
I wish that you would try
I’m not supposed to get hit
I’m not supposed to cry.
When you never even held her
When you say it’s all her fault
When you say that you don’t beat her
When the right word is assault
Now open up your eyes
And look deep into mine
That little girl who cries
feels like a waste of time.
You promised her forever
You said it as a child
You promised her a frantic love
A love that wasn’t mild
Now as you watch her world go dark
I hope you’re proud, you left your mark.
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When I wrote the first draft of this poem it was happy, pretty, and simple. When I revised it I realized it wasn't just about my friendships and what I'm dealing with, that it was also about my dad, then it got a whole lot deeper and I really found the inspiration for it.