“God, does everyone feel this way?”

Without him, I have all this empty time, 

                                      all this empty space, 

                                      all this emptiness. 

                                          That empty corner where he once was 

                               has left an empty space in me. 

                                                                                I don’t know what to do.

“God, why did you take him from me? 

  You know I need him, 

  you saw me cry just thinking about losing him while he sat still breathing in my arms.

So why take him? 

Did I do something wrong?”

I just want him back. He was one of the major reasons I stayed.

Because he needed me, I could never leave him alone. He needed his mom. And that was me.

He isn’t here now, he doesn’t need me anymore. He’s with you; waiting for me to see him again.

That brings me down to my parents. 

They’re the only ones who need me now. But that won’t always be the case. Because once everyone I love is with you, they won’t need me. Instead, they’ll wait for me. And I will be tempted to join them soon. 

“God? How do I learn to need myself? How do I learn to live for you and myself only?

I’m so lost.

So confused.

Can you hear me?”