In 3rd grade there was a new girl that came to the school named Ryan, right when she got introduced to the class I knew that I wasn’t going to like her.

A few weeks later I still haven’t said a word to her, but at recess she didn’t have anyone to play with so I said sure you can hang out with us.  I felt good since I was nice to her, but then she asked my friends the next day if my friends wanted to hang out with her but without me.  They said yes which made me really angry so I just hung out with my brother at recess that day.  It was super fishy that she didn’t want me hanging around with them because why would they exclude me, so I decided to do something about it. 

The next day they hung out without me and for the next week which,  I started plotting my revenge on Ryan.  I decided that I should bully her since she was taking my friends away from me, and I didn’t know what else to do.  Everyday in the hallway I would call her mean names (for a third grader) and make up my mind that I would join them no matter what she said at recess the next day.

The next day at recess she told me I couldn’t play with them which I didn’t listen to and I hung out with them anyway.  As we went down the slide I went down behind her and when we got near the bottom I literally pushed her off the edge of the slide and she fell right on her face.  I was the only one laughing so hard and bawling my eyes out because of it, everyone else just looked at me like what the heck are you doing.  The girl went to the recess lady and told on me which she made me go to the office and call my mom to tell her what I did.  I still wasn’t ashamed at the time of what I did, I was pretty proud, but I decided that I still wasn’t done with her.  I wanted Ryan to pay for what she did by taking my friends away from me.

That Friday I spent the night at my friend Madisons house, and I thought that I should send an email out to the girl I pushed off the slide.  I put every little nasty thing I could think of and I probably put about 2 pages worth of mean stuff to her in one email.  I didn't show Madison because I knew she would tell me to not send the email and I knew that I needed to send that email.  I pressed send then yelled to Madison that we should probably head to bed. 

That morning I woke up to an abruption I heard my name being yelled from upstairs, I thought it was her mom yelling that I could stay longer but, it was my mom upstairs and the girls friend in the living room.  Right in that moment I knew I was screwed, I didn’t know that she was going to tell her mom about the message I sent to her. Right as  I stepped upstairs my mom yelled at me”Alexis Nicole get your butt over here right now, you’re in big trouble!”

“Mom, this girl has been ruining my life she had it coming to her eventually….” I screamed.

“Mean words is not the way to settle things, you need to handle like a big girl and the way you handled it was totally inappropriate!”

“But MOM, she was ruining my life she practically took away all of my friends and I felt like this way the bestway to get my message out geez mom…”

“I don’t care what you think!  I already called your dad and he’s going to have another talk with you…”

“But mom..”

“No but get your stuff and get in the car right now!” My mom yelled. 

A few hours later after my mom, Ryan’s mom and, I went outside to talk about what I did, i’m pretty sure I got grounded for a good month.  For some stupid reason at school I kept on bullying her to the point that she didn’t even want to go to that school anymore. 

In the next month or two she changed school i’m pretty sure she even moved states.  Thinking about this makes me feel awful about myself, how could I do this to someone.  She didn’t even do anything to me, I was the one that was skipping to conclusions and thinking that she took my friends away from me even though she really didn’t.  If I ever share this with anyone everyone will be like whaaat, how could you do that to someone you’re so nice and that’s what I wonder everyday because this memory of mine haunts me everyday.